The Guardian Smashers

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The Guardian Smashers is an episode of Transformers: Renegade Rhetoric described on the Renegade Rhetoric Facebook page.


The villains known as the Guardian Smashers cause trouble, but are countered by the Guardian Auxiliary League.

Source Text

The following was posted on Facebook on January 11, 2016. [1]

Dear Cy-Kill, Other than Dr. Braxis, have any human baddies impressed you with their villainy?

Cy-Kill: On the whole, no. Oh, there might be the occasional knave with an interesting scheme, but most of them are dull as dishwater. Having said that, put a bunch of them together in a room and things start to happen. Just the other day, a battle between Fangs, Crossword, Decker Decker, and the Secret Riders resulted in Crossword using his Super Strength to toss Twister into the side of a maximum security prison. This set off quite an interesting chain of events.

Trident on Challenge of the GoBots

Who should take advantage of the opportunity presented but my old friend, Trident, the cybernetic mercenary. He scurried away into the night, determined to take revenge on the Guardians for their incarcerations. But he also knew that he would have little chance on his own, and staged a series of break-outs across the country.

Soon, he had gathered up five criminals who had crossed paths with the Guardians before. Trident was joined by Professor Frost, whose Climatizer had threatened the weather of the globe; Mr. Murchison, the crime boss who had briefly declared himself President; Doctor Cunningham, the rogue archaeologist; Major Benedict, a UNECOM officer outed as a Renegade agent; and Doctor Helstrom, whose psychic amplifier could magnify many times over the latent psionic abilities of certain humans.

With his team of Guardian Smashers assembled, Trident was ready to strike. Cunningham found a lead on the mythical Horn of Gabriel, which legend said could knock down any wall or structure. Benedict, using a Lightning Suit designed by Frost, attacked the middle eastern dig where the artifact had been located. Turbo and Small Foot attempted to stop him, but were unprepared for his firepower. With the device firmly in hand, Helstrom designed a machine to amplify the Horn's magic to a global scale. Murchison used his criminal contacts to gather the components, affording Leader-1 and Turbo a chance to stop them, but they were unprepared for Triton's new Volcano Spear cybernetic arm, another of Frost's creations.

And then the real fun began. Trident made his demands. The Guardians would leave Earth, forever, or he would knock down every significant building, bridge, wall, dam, and canal on the planet. What choice did Leader-1 have? He and the Guardians left, and the Guardian Smashers flew on Frost's tornadopacks to Washington, D.C. in triumph. But, naturally, the humans of UNECOM fought back. Matt had hatched a plan to neutralize Trident's advantage. He had gathered up Guardian allies, including Buddy, the teen genius we had once captured to force to do our bidding; Don and Greg, the racers who had once found and restored an injured Turbo; Mira Shaw, the psychic whom Helstrom had attempted to deliver to us; Professor Janus, the genius who had once used the ancient Atlanteen Amulet of Power to summon mythical beasts and bend them to his will; and Doctor Aeolis, whose Hermetic Condenser had once allowed me to literally hold every man, woman, and child on Earth in the palm of my hands. They called themselves the Guardian Auxiliary League.

What followed was an immense free-for-all. Buddy used her talents to recreate Helstrom's Psychic Amplifier, enabling Ms. Shaw to prevent the Horn of Gabriel from operating. Don and Greg, along with Nick and A.J., raced to the scene, scattering Murchison's goons. Doctor Aeolis was able to concoct a Meteorologic Neutralizer, rendering Frost's various inventions inert. Without Benedict's Lightning Suit, General Newcastle easily punched him out. Matt grappled with Trident, allowing Professor Janus to get the Horn and blow a note to knock out all of the Guardian Smashers who were left standing.

Leader-1 and the Guardians returned just in time to witness the six criminals being led away. "Well, it looks like Earth hardly needs Guardians at all, not when we have heroes like you." "Yeah," quipped Scooter, "A GoBot could get a little jealous!." Nick reassured him that, even if Earth COULD take care of itself, it would always welcome a little help from the Guardians, prompting Turbo to slap Scooter on the back a little too hard and note that, after all, these villains were only human, and the Guardian Auxiliary League would be only too happy for Guardian help once the Renegades came calling. Everyone enjoyed a good chuckle.